Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Mel Smith - 5th District Supervisor Yolo County

If you live in the 5th District here in Yolo County, its a pretty safe bet you know who Duane Chamberlain is. Duane is the 5th District's County Supervisor. You can usually see him checking on his cows along road 27 in the mornings in his pick up. If you ever attend a Yolo County Board of Supervisor's meeting, Duane is easy to spot, he is the one who doesn't look like a politician.

Exibit A

I will admit up front that I know Duane and I like the job that he is doing as Supervisor. When hair-brained ideas come before the board, if they pass, there will always be one no vote. That vote is almost always Duane. Sometimes its two no votes, Matt Rexroad is another no nonsense guy on the board.

Duane doesn't care much for going with the flow or going along to gain favor or popularity, if it is a bad idea for the 5th District, Duane will let you know. If it is something that will benefit the district, without spending money the County doesn't have, he will vote for it.

So that is Duane Chamberlain in a nut shell; business owner, farmer and opposed to hair-brained ideas everywhere.

So who you may ask, is running against Duane this fall for Supervisor?
Mel Smith.

Again you may ask, who is Mel Smith? I don't know, is the short answer. But I looked at his website after I received his glossy, mint green mailer today.

Here is the platform he seems to be running on.
  • Hide the fact you are a Democrat, the 5th is still pretty red and that is saying something when in comes to Republican politics today.
  • If you belong to a Union, he is your guy, or at least he is getting part of your paycheck even if you don't want your dues going to partisan political races.
  • He can train horses very well. One point for Mr. Smith.
  • If you need a mobile home or RV park built in your town, Mel Smith is your man.
  • The words, Ethenol and BioDiesel seem to be his solution to everything. I'm not kidding.
  • Smart Planning. I think that means more ag land being converted to mobile home parks, but I may be wrong.
  • He seems very upset at property setbacks on one acre land parcels, hmm. A real estate developer who is upset at setbacks. Hmm.

I think his own website says it best.
Mel's credentials are simple. He is a member of the National Stock Horse Association, the American Quarter Horse Association, the National Reined Cow Horse Association, a successfull small businessman, member of the Dunnigan Advisory Committee and a problem solver.

I have no doubts that Mel Smith is a likable guy, he seems to have a good tan and he looks fine in a suit. However, more mobile home and RV parks, I mean affordable senior housing developments, in our rural towns is not something I would consider a pressing issue for the 5th District, but I may be wrong. As for Ethenol and Biofuels; Corn Ethenol is a terrible idea on so many levels. It takes almost as much energy to convert corn into the end product it produces. Not very efficient is it? Plus the fact that the US exports 70% of the world's corn and taking 12% of that off the market is one of the factors causing starvation across the third world. Brazil runs on Ethenol, and they make it with sugar cane biomass, the stuff left in the fields after harvest.

It is pet peeve of mine, but if they moved the Iowa caucuses to May instead of being the first major Presidential prize, Corn Ethonol would be just another competing biofuel, and a poor one at that.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Microsoft to unveil new operating system

Oh great, just when the service pack finally comes out for Vista, Billy G. and the boys in Redmond want to screw up my mouse and keyboard too.

A Microsoft employee showed possible applications like enlarging and shrinking photos and navigating a map of San Diego by stroking the screen.

Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates framed the new feature as an evolution away from the mouse.

"Today almost all the interaction is keyboard-mouse," Gates said. "Over years to come, the role of speech, vision, ink - all of those - will be huge."

Microsoft's top two executives defended the company's last operating system, Vista, while acknowledging mistakes.

Gates said he has never been 100 per cent satisfied with any Microsoft product, and that the company prides itself on fixing shortcomings in later versions.

"Vista has given more opportunity to exercise our culture than some products," he said.

What was that last line again? More opportunity to exercise our culture? The only exercise most Vista owners get is the cardio vascular workout and high blood pressure brought on by reformatting their hard drive for the sixth time after Vista crashes.

I swear I am this close (finger and thumb almost touching) to buying a new iMac. Please Bill, just give me a new version of XP and stop this silliness before I am forced to join the dark side.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Memorial Day 2008

I find myself coming in at lunch today to a quiet house, my wife is at work with our daughter and our son is at one of his friend's house. I woke this morning at my regular time and drove my sister to the airport to fly back to Idaho, she had been staying with us for the past few a days. Yesterday we attended the early service at church and drove down to see our mother's mother. Gram had been taken to the hospital last week with dizziness, but she was released Saturday. Gram is in her 90s and aside from the trip to the hospital, she is in good shape and is still sharp as a tack.

The kids were on their best behavior and I told them how much I appreciated their coming down with us to visit. Having been raised out in country away from family, I am not in the habit of visiting family members too often, and I should change that. We had a good time with Gram talking about her family and times past. We talked about my grandfather's brother who was killed in WWII. He was on the USS Grayback, a submarine sank by a Japanese plane on February 26th, 1944. Everyone in Grams's generation knew the pain of loosing someone during the war.

After our visit we drove back towards home and my sister asked if we could see our father's grave site in Winters. I had not been there in years and none of my children had ever been there. We drove into the cemetery to see many small American flags adorning the markers of those who served in the military. After a few minutes of looking, I located my father's marker. It did not have an American flag on it.

I remember the stories he told of trying to get in the service after Pearl Harbor. He was deaf in one ear and didn't have much hearing in the other. He broke a lot of young horses as a kid and he lost his hearing after being bucked off and hitting his head on rock. My father tried all three branches of the service, they only had three back then, but couldn't pass the medical exam. He lost some friends in WWII, and he would get emotional when he talked about some of them. That was rare for my father, he was not an emotional guy. He wanted to do something to help so he went to the Mare Islands ship yards and built PT boats for the Navy.

There we are were on Sunday, my sister, my two children and I looking down at my father's headstone.

Walter J Lucas
1915 - 1991
Father - Cattle Rancher

It seems pretty simple, but that would fit my father. I am sure he would have liked to have an American Flag on his marker today, but it wasn't there. He seemed to have a sense of guilt for not serving, but in my book, he did what he could.
We walked along the rows of head stones that Sunday and tried to visit every marker with a flag. World War I, WWII, Korea, Viet Nam, some had only a rank with no war attached, just service, that is fitting as well. As we come to the end of the WWII generation, we will be loosing something as Americans, so many living examples of courage and service in their youth will soon become just words and numbers etched into granite or marble markers. We will be left with only the memories of their service. Memories that will fade with time, but will never be forgotten.

When I see a soldier in uniform today, man or woman, in any branch, I try to thank them for their service. I know these words don't mean much, but when I think of the courage and service this generation is showing, I can't help but want to thank them. I know there are many families who have lost loved ones in the war in Iraq and Afghanistan, some of them live right here in our area. I can only imagine the loss they must feel. Today as I was working out in the barn, I kept thinking about the people serving in uniform right now , how will they be remembered? Will they be remembered as another of our greatest generations?

I think they will. When you unpack all the emotion from this war, years from now we will remember a generation who volunteered to serve their nation in one of the toughest places to fight a war, and defeated an enemy set on our destruction. Under incredible conditions, in a place half a world a way, everyday they put on their gear, check their weapons and head back out on patrol or back to sit at their check point, day after day while their families worry and pray for them back home. Thank you doesn't even seem close.

If you have the Memorial Day holiday off, and even if you don't, take a few minutes to think about this all volunteer force who have won the war and has now turned the corner and is winning the peace.

God bless them, and keep them safe.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Seems like our globe isn't the only one warming

Hmm. This makes no sense. Unless I miss my guess, there are no SUVs on Jupiter, no fossil fuels being burned, no evil Americans drowning the polar bears, so why is Jupiter getting warmer?

Let me take a stab at this.

Could it be an effect from the giant ball of burning gas that our solar system revolves around?

Could that same giant ball of burning gas be causing our much closer and much smaller planet to warm slightly?

Nope, couldn't be.
That would make Al Gore wrong, and Al Gore couldn't be wrong, he has a Nobel Prize. They just don't give those out to anybody right?


Friday, May 23, 2008

Even Darth Vader gets the blues.....

Ooh, it seems I hit a nerve.

One thing about writing out your opinion, folks will have plenty to say about it.

I have received a few email about my piece on Senator Obama, some people want to take me out to the woodshed and some have wondered about my intelligence.

I wanted to publish my response to one email because it seemed more like a blog post than an email reply. I basically asked why are you voting for Obama?

I enjoy asking people why they are going to vote for Senator Obama and they usually speak about Bush, the war is a waste of time and money, the economy is terrible and oil prices are high. Not one person has pointed to a piece of legislation that Senator Obama has written while in the Senate or legislation he co sponsored with a republican in a bipartisan way, its always, Bush is bad and I am voting for change.

George W Bush will not be on the ballot this fall, so you had better find something to vote for, not someone to vote against.

If you listen to Obama's words, he speaks in broad generalities, there are hardly any specifics. There is a reason for this, if you don't give specifics, no one can ask you how it will work. My point is, as much as he wants to paint himself as an outsider who doesn't act like a typical politician, Barack Obama is exactly that. He has had three years to 'work together' and cross over the isle to 'get something done for America', and he has voted on straight party lines. In three years, he has the most liberal voting record in the US Senate. That is a fact that cannot be smoothed over with a stirring speech. He doesn't want to bring the country together, he wants the country to unite behind his liberal ideas.

Health care, if you think health care is expensive now, wait until its free. There is a reason people are flocking over our northern border to get life saving medical care, the government run health care system in Canada is absolutely terrible. Why would you sit at home to die waiting for a medical procedure that is rationed out? Look, when you listen to big government people telling you that bigger government is going to fix your problems, you had better think twice.

We could talk about the war in Iraq for months, I believe we are finally winning the peace after winning the war. You may want to read the new book by Michael Yon, or read his blog. He is on the ground, outside the wire, on the front lines, not in the green zone or back in New York telling everyone how the war is lost. He is not a Bush backer, he was extremely critical of the policies on the ground before the surge, but he is now telling of how we are winning and why leaving the way Obama proposes would be a disaster for Iraq and for America. Our troops are killing the terrorists, and al Queda is running out of suicide bombers and martyrs. Iran is shipping men and supplies into Iraq to kill our troops, they are now the ones keeping the insurgency alive.

We are at war, you may not like how we went to war, I wish the intelligence had been better myself, but that does not change the fact that Islamic fascists want to kill you and me and every American down to the last man, woman and child. We must defeat them, they are not going away, they can't be bargained with, they cannot be pacified, that form of radical Wahabist Islam must be stamped out.

The Economy has been in recession for two years? By what measure? Do you understand what a recession is? The housing bubble is what it is, blaming Bush for the housing market crash would be the same as blaming President Clinton for the Tech Bubble crash. I am also in IT and I remember 1999, 2000 and 2001 very well.

The unemployment rate as of April 2008 is at 5.0%, that is very low historically.The economy may be slowing down and we may yet have two straight quarters of decline in the GDP, that is the definition of a recession is by the way, but even the doom and gloomers say if we do see a recession, it will be short and mild.

As for oil prices, I would recommend doing a little reading about what a market economy is and how it works. Do you know who the largest supplier of foreign oil to the US is?

Saudi Arabia? No.
Iraq? No.
It's Canada, followed by Mexico.

Oil prices are set by the free market, not by Shell and Mobile, if we didn't buy oil at $135 a barrel, China would gobble it up faster than you can imagine. Supply and demand, it comes back down to that. If the democrats would let us drill off shore and in a tiny portion of Alaska, we would have more domestic oil, it isn't the answer to our energy problems, but it is one more source of energy we don't have to go out and purchase on the open market. By the way, Exxon Mobile paid 30 BILLION dollars in taxes last year, which is more than the bottom 50% of the population paid in taxes last year. If you want free stuff from the government, you might want to say thanks to the goose who lays the eggs.

As for the financing of Obama, he is doing great raising money. Lots of people are giving to his campaign and that is good, but its not all regular working class folks shelling out $10 to help Obama. and the Daily Kos do great work getting people to give to liberal causes, and the fact that he is the darling of the media doesn't hurt his fund raising either.

If people actually compared what he does with what he says instead of falling for buzzwords like hope and change, he would be just another pretty guy in a suit. Like I have said, Socialism is change, but it doesn't offer much hope.

Action speak volumes.
Senator Obama hasn't reached out, hasn't worked with the other party, hasn't done a darn thing to make this nation better other than run for President. When you run for President, your resume had better have a little more on it than this;

Joined a church for political reasons, its in his book if you want to look it up, where he listened to a crazy America-hating preacher for 20 years.

Became a community organizer, what ever that is.

State Senator for two terms.

US Senator from Illinois for three years.

Sorry, that is a cabinet level resume at best, not the top slot.

I know may read this and think I am full of beans, and you still may believe Obama when he smiles and tells you he is the answer. I see Senator Obama for what he is, the most liberal candidate the Democrats have put up for a generation or two. If you remember Jimmy Carter's time in office fondly, you will love the Obama presidency.
I wonder if Jim Smith at the Daily Democrat spends his days answering emails from upset readers?
I'll be he gets more than I do.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Get ready for 2009 folks.

You know, I am almost tempted to stay home and let the country go blue this November without a fight. Almost.

As much as I disagree with John McCain on a whole host of issues, the idea of casting a vote for, or giving money to Barack Obama is unthinkable to me. I understand that most Americans, including a lot of the people I know think President Bush suffers from some mild form of mental retardation or he is just a simpleton who somehow became President by mistake. These are also the same folks who get their news from The Daily Show and the Colbert Report. They will be voting this fall.

Watching the crowd at the Obama rally in Oregon over the weekend, I looked out at the face of new American voter. Oh, and don't they love it when Senator Obama starts telling them the real problem with the world is the United States of America.

"We can't drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times ... and then just expect that other countries are going to say OK," Obama said.

"That's not leadership. That's not going to happen," he added.

The crowd erupts with enthusiasm. Great.

If you want just a small glimpse of the wonderland that awaits the nation if Senator Obama is elected, together with a filibuster proof majority in the Senate, take a look at the rules concerning the food they will serve at the Democratic convention in Denver;

Fried foods are forbidden at the committee's 22 or so events, as is liquid served in individual plastic containers. Plates must be reusable, like china, recyclable or compostable. The food should be local, organic or both.

And caterers must provide foods in "at least three of the following five colors: red, green, yellow, blue/purple, and white," garnishes not included, according to a Request for Proposals, or RFP, distributed last week.

The shrimp-and-mango ensemble? All it's got is white, brown and orange, so it may not have the nutritional balance that generally comes from a multihued menu.

"Blue could be a challenge," joked Ed Janos, owner of Cook's Fresh Market in Denver. "All I can think of are blueberries."

Just think, the people in charge of making the rules for the convention menu will be appointed to head various departments in the government come January of next year. Somehow the idea these people will make my life simpler and bring forth economic growth in an era of a global economy is hard for me to grasp.

Maybe I'm just not bright enough to understand how more regulation, more government, five colored food groups and more taxes coming out of my pocket will lead to economic growth and individual freedom. But what do I know, I'm just a guy from Esparto.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

The Stupidity Bubble

We have heard much in the past few months about the 'housing bubble'. The prices for homes here in California kept growing and growing, until finally the market collapsed under its own weight. Many people were hit hard when the housing bubble burst and more than a few lost their homes. I feel for those people, I do, but you cannot use your home as an ATM forever, planning on it's value to increase each year. Eventually, the economic cycle will catch up with you, that is why is it called a cycle.

We are heading towards the end of another bubble, one that will effect every Californian, and every American. I am calling it, The Stupidity Bubble. Let me explain.

In the past decade it seems the only thing that has grown as rapidly as our home values is the unquenchable desire to spend more of our tax dollars. Now before you write letters telling me the reason we are in a budget mess in Sacramento is the fact that our economy is in terrible shape, let me say this. Horse manure.

The reason we are in a budget mess is the democratically controlled state legislature and our 'moderate' republican Governor don't seem to have the courage to tell us that the party is over and someone has to pay the bill. We were asked years ago by the Governor to borrow billions of dollars to get out of this 'one time' financial crisis and from that time forward, he would hold down spending. He hasn't. Sure, you can point to a few battles where he and minority party stuck together and won a few concessions from Democrats, but in the past few years the Governor has spent money like a drunken Seaman on his first shore leave.

Let's take a look at how much money we spend as a State.

For the budget year 2004-2005, Governor Schwarzenegger's first full year in office, the State of California spent in its general fund 79,804,000,000 dollars, think about that, that is Seventy Nine Billion, Eight Hundred and four Million dollars and change.

For the current year, the Governor's budget for the general fund is 103, 000,000,000.
To make this easy to get your mind around, the legislature and the Governor have increased spending to the tune of 24,000,000,000. Twenty four Billion dollars in four years. What did we spend all this new money on? Everything under the sun, office buildings, new computers, more government employees, more of everything. Why? Because you said it was ok.

Yes, you. You sent this same pack of thieves back to Sacramento because you didn't pay attention, and because you believed them when they said the teachers need more money for classroom supplies and prison guards needed better retirement benefits and we need to do something about this program or that type of financial aid. To be honest folks, you believed the politicians when they said they would make things better through more and bigger government.
If we have learned anything, and it pains me to say we have not, an ever expanding government becomes less and less efficient, and less and less accountable to those who pay for it.

Now it looks like the Governor wants to kick this can down the road one last time. If he can convince you to borrow against future State lottery revenues, another 'one time' fix, the State can make a few narrow cuts and the politicians will spend next year praying the housing market comes back strong and more tax revenue will flow in. If that doesn't happen, we will be in worse shape next year, with no more 'one time' fixes left on the shelf. It is just plain stupidity.

When you are going broke, getting another credit card is not the answer. After you sit down at the kitchen table with your spouse, you can crunch numbers all you want, but at the end of the day you are spending more than you are earning.

The next bit of bad news is the Governor proposes a 1% sales tax increase if the voters don't go for the Lottery deal. That is stupidity at its finest, if we can't borrow more money, we will raise your taxes.

If we just went back to spending rates we had two years ago, that would almost eliminate the budget deficit for next year. Why won't anyone cut spending? No one want to go up against the public labor unions, no one. If you dare to take away anything you promised them when the state was flush with cash, you will hear a hue and cry from Alturas to San Diego. The amount of money the unions would spend against any politician from either party who would dare roll back spending for their members would be incredible. The television screens would be filled with menacing music and pictures of falling down, overcrowded classrooms and fire fighters explaining how your home will surely burn to ground with you in it if you don't vote for their candidate. And you know what, you would probably believe them again.

Eventually, as the City of Vallejo is finding out, stupidity combined arrogance will only last so long. The bill has to be paid someday, that someday is coming, and its coming soon.

Do you just hear a popping noise?

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Fast Mean Cows and Slow Mean Cows.

Those are the two types of cattle in the world according to Patrick F McManus, 'Fast Mean Cows' and 'Slow Mean Cows'. My wife is in full agreement with that conclusion. We raise 'city cows'. What, you may ask is a city cow? These are cattle that have been raised near the public and have seen most everything. Lowriders with bass speakers thumping a tune so loud it might curdle their milk if they were in close proximity too long, F-15 Eagles hitting their afterburners overhead, and every kind of dog, cat, chicken and remote control plane has chased them. In life experience, my cows would be the equivalent of the Las Vegas police department. Been there, done that.

Our city cows also have names, although not as many as we used to. There are four or five who still come up to the truck to eat out of your hand, one of those is Emmett. He is the bull and he is as sweet a bovine as you can find, but scary as the dickens to those who don't know him. He weighs about 1,800 pounds and stands even with your chin, if your tall. While he is docile and friendly, he is also very large and when he wants to eat, you better feed him. He is what my wife would consider a 'slow mean cow', or bull in his case. Most of our cattle fall into that category, except when they have calves. When they drop that calf on the ground, they become 'fast mean cows'.

Which takes us to this afternoon. One of our cows had a new calf Sunday and it had a hard time nursing its mother. My wife took the pair up to the barn to help the calf get on his feet. A good plan, until the cow and calf escaped today. Running down the road the escaped bovines encountered my wife and her friend on the golf cart. The cow looked at my wife and gave a snort. My wife got out of cart and tried to open a gate to get the offending cow off the road. As my wife approached, the cow lowered her head. "She bluffing" my wife said to her friend. The cow was not bluffing. As she chased my wife back into the golf cart, sending her out the other side, my wife decided correctly that the cow was now in full-on "fast mean cow' mode. The calf however thought my wife was pretty cool and since she had been bottle-feeding him, the calf thought he might find a little snack in my wife's lap. The cow did not see the humor in this, mama started to smack the golf cart with her head and bellow like mean cows do.

Thirty exhilarating, or terrifying seconds later, depending on whether you are telling the story or you are the subject of the story, the cow and calf were herded into the pen and the episode comes to an end. I can attest that there is no better feeling that putting a closed gate between you and a fast mean cow.

Raising cattle is a bit like a running a foster home, mixed with running a high security prison. The cattle need your care and attention from time to time and you do get to know them and love them, but they are always trying to escape and if you are not paying attention, the more devious ones will try to kill you.

Don't you just love cattle? I do.
My wife? Not so much right now.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Hippies. Free love, but that's about it.

My impressions from the Whole Earth Festival in Davis.

A new Tie-dyed, peace symbol t-shirt;
Twenty three dollars.

A groovy set of hand made thong-less sandals;

One Hundred and nine dollars.

A stylin' new pair of plum corduroy pants;

One hundred and ten dollars.

Spending $242 of your parent's money to look they did back in 1971 for $8;


Saturday, May 10, 2008

Paintball is evil.

Well, not exactly evil, but it sure hurts!

I have been resisting my son's invitations to go paintballing with him for a few years now. I told him I played paintball once, before they had restrictions on the speed of the balls and all the fancy guns shooting 20 balls per second. When I played they used pump action guns and the guys who played all the time would freeze their paintballs so they wouldn't jam in their guns. Let me tell you, a frozen paintball hitting you at 400 feet per second hurts like, well, it just hurts.

When I came back from that paintball experience, 18 years ago, I looked like I had been beaten by a gang of crack addicts armed will ball peen hammers. Big purple bruises and red welts, that soon turned into bruises. Thank you very much, but I have experienced all the paintball I ever wanted in one day.

OK, so I'm not very bright and went again last night.

It was fun. I am still nursing the bad knee from my Quad incident, so I am not very mobile. Being mobile seems to be a big advantage in paintball, being fast and young doesn't hurt either. No one would mistake me for fast or young, so basically I am a giant, slow moving, target.

I was shot. Many, many times.
Most of the shots were from far away, 30 or 40 yards, so they did not hurt at all. Just a slap and a little sting. The shot I took from fifteen yards away, that one hurt.

I have a quarter sized red mark on my chest that will soon turn into a half dollar sized bruise. You know what I always say, no pain, no gain.

I am just trying to figure out what the gain is. I guess spending time with my son doing something he loves is the gain. I just wish he would love something a little less painful.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Prius owners are killing the planet!

That is what my bumper sticker will say when I get one of these....

What is it? Its the Volkswagen 1L concept car. It should be out in 2010, hey that's less than two years away. This car gets, are you ready for this, 200 miles per gallon.

I can see it now, all the used Prius' sitting next to the Suburbans and the Hummers in the 'gas guzzler' portion of the car lot.

Wait a minute, if we all drove these cars, we would reduce our oil use, and if we reduce our oil use, the supply of oil will last longer, if the supply lasts longer that will not drive the market to find alternative sources of fuel. We will still be burning fossil fuels! The horror, the horror.

Oh my, I'll bet the environmentalist are in a quandary, it would be better for them if we just ran out of oil. I remember hearing about how we would run out of oil by the year 2000, then it was 2010, and now its 2050 or something like that. So what if every car on the planet delivered 200 miles a gallon, would the greens be happy then? No, because we would still be burning oil and oil is evil don't you know.

Maybe they should change tactics. Maybe they should promote driving old muscle cars, if we all had to drive a 1971 Chevy Chevelle with an LS6 big block with 456 gears in the rear end, we would be getting about 4-7 miles per gallon. Say goodbye to all the light sweet crude.

We would use up the oil much faster, and we would get to where we are going much quicker. I know its silly, but dang, it would be cool. I would opt for a Hemi Cuda if I had my choice.

I may buy a 1L VW when they come out, not because I want to act superior and feel like I'm doing something to save the world, its because I'm cheap.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Hillary; dead as disco?

Morning Kathy, I see your girl barely beat Obama in Indiana, and Barack beat her like a rented mule in North Carolina.

Yea, yea, well Obama doesn't have enough delegates to clinch the nomination Mark.

C'mon Kathy, give it up, she's toast. The super delegates aren't going to save her. Her time is past, Barack is the future of the democratic party.

I don't care what you say Mark, we are fighting it all the way to Denver.

Look Kathy, even Tim Russert said that Barack is going to be the nominee, why doesn't she drop out and go back to New York, or Arkansas or where ever she came from.

Who made Tim Russert the King maker? Just cause he says its so doesn't make it a fact Mark.

Look Kathy, Hillary is an old battle axe from the past, the clock has struck twelve and she has the smell of ripe pumpkin all around her. Let the dream go, your not going to have woman President this year.

Pumpkin or not, I will be at Denver screaming out her name when she accepts the nomination after the Super delegates find out a little more about your big eared, America hating, smooth talking, closet Muslim.

Closet Muslim, Kathy, what are you talking about? You know Barack better than that. He's no Muslim.

I know, I'm sorry, I just want Hillary to win so much.

C'mon Kathy, I'll buy you a double, non-fat, soy latte.

Thanks Mark. Sorry about the big eared thing.

Don't worry about it, it will all be over soon.

I know, and I just bought another dozen Hooray for Hillary t-shirts to give out as mother's day gifts. They were on closeout.

I'll bet they were.

I need more weekends.

I'll bet Senator Obama has a plan for that, he is going to solve all our other problems, more weekends should be child's play for him.

I know it seems like every weekend there is always something going on, an event, a birthday party, a fence building party, a family picnic, but May is booked solid and June isn't shaping up much better.

This Saturday, the 10th is the Yolo County Cattlemen and Wool Growers spring picnic. I know our secretary may kill me, but if you want to join in on the fun, drop me an email asap (yolo_cowboy[at] RVSPs were supposed to be in last week, but I should be able to get you in. I will be cooking the tri-tip over almond wood and we always have a good time.

The following weekend is the Civil War Reenactment at Gibson Ranch in Elverta. Our family will be there and the weather should be great.

The weekend of the 24th and 25th is Memorial Day weekend, I'm still not sure what we are doing, but it will be a busy time for us. Our daughter's birthday is close to that weekend, so I am sure our house will be invaded by screaming 8 year old girls. (do they make any other kind?)

June? I don't even want to talk about June. The end of June will be our 20th wedding anniversary. My wife doesn't like to travel all that much, but I am sure we will do something.

Somewhere in all those weekends I still need to finish my fences, get my Jeep running, work my cows and about eight hundred other things. I need more weekends in my months.

If you have seen a plan by Senator Obama that will address this, let me know. He can do anything, just ask his supporters.

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Golf, I need to play more, and by more, I mean more than once a year.

I was asked to play in a just for fun golf event at work yesterday. The group needed a fourth, and my co-worker asked if I played well. I laughed, hard.

Are you kidding?
I play once or twice a year, my average score for 18 holes is the average temperature for Phoenix Arizona, in August.

It was a scramble event and all in all, I played pretty well. I sank two 10 footers and hit three or four long drives that actually stayed on the fairway. Not bad for a once a year hacker.

I won't tell you about the ones I topped, skulled, shanked, and the drive that didn't make it past the lady's tee. We used to have a rule when we played 'daiquiri golf' back in college, if your drive didn't make it past the lady's tee you had to play that hole with you pants down.

No, I didn't play that hole in my boxers, I am glad I don't play with close friends who could shame me into doing it.

Nobody, and I mean nobody, wants to see that.

Friday, May 02, 2008

Undocumented? Well, sort of.

I hear the term 'undocumented worker' all the time. I have to laugh. Its not that they don't have documents, its just their documents are fake or they are using someone else's documents, hopefully not mine.

This one takes the cake.

A, for effort.
A, for showing love to your girlfriend.
F, for thinking it would work.

Hat tip to John C