Speakerphone terrorism.

Ok, is everybody on?

Yes, here.

Praise be to Allah this contraption is working.

God is great. I am here also.

Great, great, well first I want to thank the honorable Mr. Hassan Nasrallah for capturing the two Zionist pig soldiers and sending them back to me here in Iran. Good work, they are now guests of the new Ayatollah.

What about me? I am the one who dug the tunnel and captured the first Zionist pig and killed his two Zionist friends.

Ah my friend Khaled Meshaal, no one is forgetting you and the way you started this whole diversion, I mean Holy War.






Diversion?

I'm sorry President Asad, a slip of the tongue. This is a wonderful chance to finally rid the world of the Zionist threat. They should all die in a fiery Hell, praise be to Allah. You all should be commended for your service to the one true God.





Yea, that's easy for you to say, sitting out of air-strike range in Tehran.





Hey, I am in this with you guys, all the way, I mean who is sending you the money and rockets to kill the Jews anyway? Iran boys, and don't you forget it.





Sorry.




My Bad.





I love you Mahmoud.





Don't get emotional on me Hassan, Hezbollah needs you to be strong and ferocious big guy.




Mr. President, I am getting concerned with the Zionist pigs flying their airplanes over Lebanon, what if they strike my palace in Damascus?





I told the world that a strike against you would bring a devastating response.





Will you use your nuclear weapon?





When its ready boys, when its ready.





How long do we have to keep up these rocket attacks?





Until the western news media turns the popular opinion against the Zionists pigs.





Give us a ballpark timeframe.






A week to ten days before the BBC, CNN and the New York Times run feature stories on the innocent children being killed in Gaza and Lebanon. That will make the world run to the UN calling for diplomacy. That should give me another six to eighteen months to work on the nuke.





What if Bush gets the EU to threaten sanctions and the Russians and Chinese go along with them?





Fire another hundred rockets at the Jews, that should keep everyone's attention away from Tehran for another six months.




Are you sure can get a working weapon in less than two years?





You can't put a timetable on these things, but if we can keep the worlds eyes on the Jews, the North Koreans say they might sell us a working bomb.





Cool.

Yea Baby.





Is that crazy little yellow infidel really going to sell you a nuke?





Hey his people are eating their shoes, they need hard money bad, they will sell us anything.





Ok, so to sum up, Asad, he keep cool and keep quiet and nothing will happen to you.
Nasrallah, you keep your Hezbollah fighters firing those rockets at the Jews until the media pressures them to go UN for peace talks. Meshaal, you keep killing the Jews until you hear otherwise. Ok, are we clear? Thanks everyone, we will talk again next Monday, but it might be later, I don't want to miss 24.